2010

A new year has dawned and with that comes thoughts of where I want to go in my life this year.  We had the most inspiring message at church today- we were encouraged to focus on what we ARE, rather than what we DO.  It was a most timely message.

A while ago, I sat down with my sweet friend Sara and we were totally upfront about some things that we had been struggling with- idols, if you will.  I could tell that the Lord was beginning something within me, but I wasn't sure exactly what that was.

Fast forward a few weeks and my boss was telling me the way she determines her focus for the new year.  It sounded so incredible, that I hopped on board with her, Sara and a couple other ladies.  I sat and prayed, answering questions about myself and reading things others had to say about me.  I wasn't shocked to find that my answer was exactly what I had felt God saying to me earlier in the year.

So, it is with great anticipation and (to be quite honest) a little bit of fear that I embark on this new year with a new focus- humility.  I feel a little silly even admitting that because it seems counter-intuitive to "announce" a focus like humility.  But the one thing that I want to learn more deeply in 2010 is just Who my God is- how big and mighty and powerful and awesome... and how SMALL I am in comparison to Him... that I can do nothing apart from Him.

I have a "plan" to help encourage myself in this walk:
1.  Memorize- scripture throughout the year that involves humility.  REALLY memorize, not just learn it for a week and then move on.  I want the Word hidden so deeply in my mind and heart that I breathe it.
2.  Give sacrificially- one of the "practices" of humility was stewardship.  I want to be a better steward with the gifts God has given to me.
3.  Learn how to REALLY study the Word of God.  I want His Word to be my LIFE.
4.  Submit.  Submit.  Submit.  To the Lord.  To my husband.  To those in authority.  I allow myself way too many excuses for not submitting.  It's time to get over myself and let go.

I suppose that last "point" should really be number 1.  Because without submitting to the Lord, I will just be trying to get better.  And that's not what I want.  I want a life that is so immersed in Him, that I am daily on my knees surrendered to Him.

I leave you with my first memory verse- the verse that sums up beautifully what I want to be true of me:

Isaiah 66:2
"Has not my hand made all these things,
and so they came into being?"
declares the Lord.
"This is the one I esteem:
he who is humble and contrite in spirit,
and trembles at my word."

Jesus, give me a heart that trembles at Your word.  Teach me daily to surrender to You.  Show me more of Who You are.  I love you.