growing pains

I have a very distinct memory of being young and walking into my parent's bedroom in the middle of the night, tears falling down my face because my body ached. I could never fully express what I was feeling, so mom and dad named them growing pains. It seems like just yesterday my legs were tight with growth, my arms being stretched beyond their capacity. Those were aches that every child experiences during their growth process, but I was certain I was falling apart and no one else in the world had ever lived with such pain.

Last night mom asked me if I was okay. I can't say something is WRONG. But I would have to say I am living with some growing pains right now. These are growing pains of the spirit. I can feel my heart and soul being stretched; the refiner's fire is at work within my life, melting away the stone to create something beautiful for my God.

And I know that, like those pains of my early days, this is a period of growth in my life. I will come through this with a deepened confidence in my faith, a newfound appreciation of the holiness of my God.

"I guess I thought that I had figured You out.
I knew all the stories and I learned to talk about
How You were mighty to save.
But those were only empty words on a page.
Then I caught a glimpse of who You might be.
The slightest hint of You brought me down to my knees."
--Addison Road

"and the things of earth will grow strangely dim
in the light of His glory and grace"

--Jesus, make the things of this world pale in comparison to You.
give my heart a hunger and thirst for You,
for Your truth and Your voice.

now i understand

If there is one thing I have learned in my 2 brief years of being a mom is that all my preconceived notions regarding motherhood have flown straight out the window.

For example, I always hated kids with boogers. Gross. Now I understand that in the winter, nothing short of a surgically implanted kleenex will keep a toddler completely booger-free.

My most recent discovery came with one of John Mark's birthday presents... the dreaded LIGHT UP article of clothing. You see, I have always been entirely opposed to all things "clothing" with lights- shoes, hats, etc. I never understood why these were popular. To me they were entirely unnecessary and waaaay too cheesy.

Two weeks ago my proclamations of "my child will NEVER wear light up clothes" was put to rest. John Mark was given a light up cars t-shirt. And he fell in love. It's the only shirt he wants to wear. So what did my mother do? What any self-respecting grandma would do- buy him 2 more.

So I am now officially "that mom." You know, the one whose kid only wears shirts that light up.

18 weeks to 26.2

That's right.
This begins my first week of official training for the full marathon in Dallas.
Every time I think about it, I get so excited.
A separate blog is in the works to be dedicated entirely to marathon updates, so keep your eyes peeled.

Until then, here is my training update for today.
Running total: 3 miles, 26 minutes
Uniform: Gray mesh shorts, hot pink dri-fit racerback tank
Playlist: Rihanna, The Killers, Telecast, U2...